The New Boots
An old farmer went out and bought a new pair of boots. He was really proud of these boots too and couldn't wait to show his wife.
He got home and she was in the kitchen washing dishes. He stood with a huge smile on his face and asked, "Notice anything different
She turns and looks him over. "Nope."
Frustrated, he goes to the bedroom and takes off everything except the boots and goes back into the kitchen.
"Notice anything now?"
"All I can see is your limp dick. It was that way yesterday and it'll be that way tomorrow."
"Yes, but look at what it's pointing to. My new boots."
"Huh," she replied. "you should have bought a hat Marv, you should have bought a hat."